April Fools Unveiled

I have been trying to get on line for the last three days to post this blog and let everyone know that I was joking. I never intended that people would really believe what I fabricated, but I thought it still best to give a hint that it was a joke. By posting on April 1 and providing a hint, I thought that most everyone would realize that I was playing around. While we covet your prayers, I just hope that there were not prayer times for our made-up family travails. At one point, I laughed to myself thinking about some church group praying for the Ironsides who have bats in their home, worms coming out of their bottoms, and cobras trying to bite them. We tried to think of more crazy things to include, but everything that the boys suggested was too outlandish (lions in our yard, elephants stealing our vegetables). Well, maybe with the gullibility of some, even those would not have been so unbelievable. The idea was that people would be fooled up until the final line of the blog.

So, the question has come from a few as to what was true and what was fiction. Basically, the ideas came from real events, but were greatly embellished to make it more shocking. The lies that are most believable are always those that contain an element of truth, which even Satan, the father of lies, often employs.

I totally made up the story about the monkeys. They had not been to our compound, and we have never seen any that were carrying sticks as weapons. However, two days after posting the April 1st blog, we saw four monkeys right outside our gate. So, maybe it was somehow prophetic, though I would not want any of the other events to come to pass.

The boys did find a dead snake while we are at the pool, but it was totally dead (as opposed to mostly dead) and did not try to bite them. I never saw it, so I don’t know what kind it was. Pamela really did have a group of 50 women at our house for a seminar.

We did go to a village church, but there were not any “native dancers” and the only things that we were served were Coke and Fanta.

We have had several sick boys, but none of them had worms coming out of bodily orifices.

We do actually have to have our house fumigated for bats in the attic, but I have never seen any in our house.

So, it was a lie wrapped inside of some real events. I see pastors here twisting the scriptures in similar ways, and I know that it occurs in the US and the rest of the world, as well. Many years ago I heard Pastor Adrian Rogers give a wonderful example that I have not forgotten. He said that the most dangerous lies are those that are closest to the truth. He gave the example of two watches; one that is 6 hours slow and another that is 30 minutes slow. He then asked which is the most dangerous. He stated that if I look at my watch and see that the time is 6 hours off, then I will most certainly recognize that something is wrong with my watch. However, if I look to my watch and the time is only 30 minutes off, then I probably will not recognize it and could miss an important engagement. Mostly truth mixed with a lie is still a lie. Beware the false teachers and the lies of Satan, who mix the truth with a lie or alter the truth to deceive us.

I think that my next fabrication will involve telling people to send me money so that they can get blessed or something. At least, I should benefit financially from being so convincing. HINT: I am only joking. See how easily this works. When you see the word “hint”, it provides a clue. Yes, I am being a smart aleck (sp?). I did hear that a few thought that the hint was that Pamela was having a birthday in April. That was not the reason for the hint, but her birthday is on the 28th and I know that she would love to get a card in the mail. It only takes about two weeks to get a letter here so you still have time. You can send it to: Ironside Family, World Gospel Mission, PO Box 11788, Kampala, Uganda.

Congratulations to Lisa Knaus who was the first to write me saying that she believed that it was all an April Fools joke. I will not reveal the many people who wrote to me thinking that it was real. Hey, I just had an idea. I could threaten to post their emails unless they send me money, especially the ones asking if I captured the stick-wielding monkeys on video or if we took pictures at church.

From now on, my blogs will contain only true events, until at least next April. Thanks for being such faithful readers. I waited a week to post again so that people would have ample opportunity to read the joke blog before I revealed that it was all in jest.

Also, we are still having emails that you send to us that we never receive. If you do not hear back from us within a few days of sending, you should try sending again. We know of several people who have emailed recently, and we never got their email. It really is aggravating not knowing what makes it through. By the way, we love getting updates on Niceville baseball, both for the little league and the high schoolers.

We hope that you had a wonderful Easter celebrating our risen Savior! We had between 700-800 students in church yesterday morning for Easter service, and there was not an empty seat. We took our projector to campus last night and showed “The Passion of the Christ” and over 600 students came. We gave an invitation at the end and one man came forward to receive Christ. We would like to start showing movies on a regular basis because there was such a good turnout. I think that the next movie we will show will be “Facing the Giants”. Our family has already watched it twice and we loved it. Such a powerful message in an intriguing story line! They don’t know American football at all, but we have showed the movie to Ugandans and Kenyans and they both really enjoyed it, too. We would welcome suggestions on good movies to show, preferably those with a Christian message. Also, the church could really use a projector for not just movies, but also for projecting the words to worship songs during church services. We are using mine some, but I do not believe that I should give it to them because 1) it was a gift from SAIC to me, and 2) it is 110 volt and the power here is 240 volt. So, if God’s Spirit is prompting you to provide a projector, then please let me know and I will coordinate the details. It would be a huge benefit to the ministry and a good kingdom investment.

We miss you all.
Kevin for the Tribe